Happiness is when what you think, what you say, and what you do are in harmony. ~
Mahatma Gandhi
When I went to bed last night I was thinking that sometimes it would be nice to be back to the old me hopping around on one foot trying to get my tights on and the cats fed at the same time as I tended to be running late for work but had gotten to where I was actually there on time. Lighting a cig and wondering if it would be a gym night or friends night or if I'd see Martin. Living life all about me.
Back then I never thought of politics until it was election time, stayed focused on the issues that I felt were the most important and voted by the information from the debates. I didn't watch MSNBC or Fox just the people running. Sometimes my friends and I would discuss matters over lunch or breaks or on boring days right in my office. But mostly life was about cute clothes and hot shoes and hair and work outs to keep me tone and music and going out to fun party spots.
I didn't volunteer because I didn't have time. I gave a shoebox at the gym for Samaritan's purse each year and to the March of Dimes and breast cancer walk. A lot of times helping someone out meant praying for them. Not that it isn't important but I think many a person has been hurt by a church just "praying" for them or friends and no one actually "doing" anything to help them. I believed that Baptists were the bests and most of the others not saved though I didn't walk a very straight path myself. I felt women shouldn't preach because some man who decided to write Timothy had told me so and that if it was in the Bible then it had to be the truth. In fact I believed that women couldn't be deacons in the church and shouldn't wear pants in to worship. In fact you still don't catch me in church in pants. Why, well some things just get stuck too strong to change.
Then I got married and then I got a dog and then I had a lot of time on my hands. I left full time to make a different life and a quiet calm life for us here. But unlike most married women having security didn't make me freak out about losing that security and turn super conservative. With time on my hands I started this blog, Al Gore gave me an inconvenient truth, and I did start volunteering. I figured hey, this is time to give back to the community. Not that I really thought I owed the community. I'd worked hard, my family worked hard and my husband certainly worked hard for everything we had. I felt more like I could do something nice for other people who hadn't been as lucky or fortunate in life as I had.
Walks through the woods with the dogs or my camera, sitting by the pond in the quiet, or riding a river in Montana made me appreciate nature and the earth even more. March of the Penguins and reports on the polar bears bothered me.
I read "The Road" giving me more reason to wonder and worry. We all know its coming but we don't do anything about it the guy says. Well that rings true. I've been begging Martin to stock up on bullets. I don't want to be eaten by the bad guys. Too many people believe that as a blessed nation God won't let that happen to us and I think you have to be out of your mind. When have God's people not suffered? They've been impaled, fed to tigers, raped, robbed... So yes, God protects us by giving us the strength to get through things but we all die and many of us will suffer. The whole thing of bad things not happening to us is ridiculous. .
Now to make this shorter and come to an end I basically had decided I never blogged my personal opinions on anything anymore. Some have no place here. Some might confuse my opinions with my husband's and you shouldn't. But as Thanksgiving comes and another Christmas and my 44th birthday in the spring I have to wonder what turn I am in for now. I've figured out that most politicians lie. Most are crazy. I can't stand the extremists on either side. Yes I still love Obama but in Poli-wood the guy states that politics are like reality TV but it isn't real. THAT I believe. TV charisma has more to do with the winners than anything.
As for helping others it doesn't take long to become jaded to those too used to a hand out. Generations bred so used to being cared for by the taxpayers that they don't even appreciate it but expect it. Being exposed to it doesn't take long to turn you. What it doesn't do though is turn you from the children. I look into little dirty faces or children so uneducated and backward and it makes you so mad inside. And until we figure out as a nation how to help the children without their parents then we're stuck in a cycle that will bankrupt us. Something for nothing isn't working.
So as this new turn approaches I've decided that I'm glad I met bloggers from different religions and cultures. Glad I've traveled more places in the world. I'm glad I've opened myself up to new ideas. I'm glad I've read and pondered books not included in the Bible and works on the bible. I still want to help save our earth for the future generations and I want to help children and the hungry and the old. I want to help Fido and stop all these unwanted pets from being born and then having to die. In other words I want to do whatever I can to make any kind of difference for those that cannot help themselves. I no longer feel like I "owe" society because I am fortunate enough to not have to work full time. What I do I do because I want to. I have peace in my heart and my mind. Love for others I never thought I'd find. But if I spend months holed up with just Toonces, my family or the kids and my friends....I'm not going to feel bad about it. I've come to see that is an important part of life too, and we don't get a second go around.
I like that country song:
God is Great. Beer is good. And people are crazy.
I so agree.
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